How many times have you tried to go on a diet and failed? How many times have you tried to exercise and ended up not doing it again? Why does it seem so easy when other people do it, and it takes so much effort on your end without any visible results? Where did you go wrong?

Being healthy is not all about dieting and exercising. Your behavior is a major factor in successfully living a healthy lifestyle. Being healthy is not all about looking sexy. It includes an overall sense of wellbeing, a state of being happy, healthy, and comfortable. Optimum health encompasses the mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical aspects of an individual. You cannot be called healthy if you are depressed, even if you have a desirable body weight. You cannot be considered a fit individual if you cannot even have the strength to walk a few meters without having to catch your breath, even if your weight is within a normal range. In my over two decades of private practice as a registered nutritionist dietitian, I have met individuals with normal body weight, even considered slim, yet have high body fat percentage and elevated blood lipid values (triglycerides and cholesterol). On the other hand, there are individuals who may be a bit overweight but have normal body fat and high muscle mass. This is especially common among athletes.

Let us get down to the common obstacles that hinder you from starting and sustaining a healthy lifestyle.

You easily fall prey to the promise of quick-fix solutions. You did not gain weight overnight. You will never ever lose weight overnight. Exercising for one hour or eating a salad the whole day will not make you lose weight permanently. Staying at a healthy weight range takes time, effort, and consistency. If you have been eating healthy and being physically active, yet the weighing scale doesn’t budge at all, keep going. Pay attention to other factors, such as being more energetic, feeling lighter, sleeping better, experiencing fewer symptoms like sluggishness, moodiness, bloating, and more. Eventually, the scale will tip. Consistency is the key to sustaining a healthy mind and body.

You are a doubtful dieter. A term coined by world-renowned obesity medicine physician, Dr. Robert Kushner, and colleagues, a doubtful dieter believes that nothing will work for them. They may believe that strategies are effective for other people, but they doubt that they will ever work on themselves. If you have this mindset, then you might as well consider yourself doomed. However, even if you’re doubtful but have the willingness to try, you have hope. Being in denial of facts is one thing. We can’t deny facts. Just like you can’t deny your actual weight and symptoms. If your blood pressure is high, you can’t tell yourself that it is normal. However, a doubtful dieter dwells on negative thinking. This will result in negative outcomes. After all, self-doubt becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Feeling hopeless and helpless cannot be denied, but how you react to these negative emotions will determine your success in pursuing and taking control of your overall health. Whenever you find yourself slipping back to old habits, for example, you ate a bag of chips, acknowledge that you ate something that isn’t beneficial to your health, but don’t allow yourself to dwell on that, and instead focus on doing something more productive, like taking a walk and planning your next healthy food intake. Tell yourself that you already had a treat and so you can eat a healthier option later. Stick to it. While eating should be both healthy and pleasurable, we also have to bear in mind that we need to eat healthy food to achieve optimum health, even if they are not as tasty as the unhealthy options. If you are too tired to exercise and skipped one day, rest as much as you can and schedule the exercise the next day. Then stick to it. If the schedule doesn’t permit a full workout, try getting short periods of physical activity throughout the day. Such as 10 minutes of walking in place or inside your room three times a day. That would total a 30-minute walk, which is better than no movement at all. Committing a mistake does not mean you have to just let go of your control and keep indulging in unhealthy habits while thinking that you already messed up anyway, so might as well just go all the way. You need to tell yourself that you can decide to stop it and do something positive, one small bite and one small step at a time.

You are a people pleaser. Did you know that your people-pleasing habits sabotage your health and wellbeing? It takes your time and effort away from self-care. A people pleaser cares too much about the opinion of others. For example, they are scared that they might offend people if they turn down a second helping during mealtime. They feel guilty for not accommodating people because they scheduled a gym workout. It will initially feel awkward and uncomfortable to politely say, “No, thank you.” Oftentimes, you don’t need to feel pressured to give an explanation. Simply say, “I’m sorry, I am unavailable on that date and time.” Then go do your self-care as planned. Self-care isn’t being selfish. It is a wise thing to do as long as it is within the context of a balanced life. If you’re being offered something that you don’t like to eat or isn’t going to benefit your health, you can simply say “Thank you, I’ve had enough,” or “I’ll try it another time, I’m already full,” or “I’ll just have some,” and then don’t go for seconds! Once people see your commitment and you have established your boundaries, they will respect you and may even be inspired by your healthy habits.

Take time to reflect on what attitudes and behaviors you have that have been hindering you from taking control of your lifestyle and robbing you of a healthy mind and body.