CEBU CITY – A former television host who belongs to the LGBTQ community was heavily criticized for his alleged rash behavior inside a restaurant here on Sunday night, July 21.
BACALSO (FB)
Jude Bacalso has since apologized for the incident that saw him admonish a server of Ulli’s Restuarant for supposed misgendering after he was called “sir.”
“This is a huge chunk of humble pie that I must ingest, because I have erred,” Bacalso posted on his Facebook account on Monday, July 22.
According to Merriam-Webster.com, misgendering happens when the gender of a person, such as a nonbinary or transgender person, is misidentified through label or pronoun.
The incident became publicized when one John Calderon posted on Facebook what he witnessed in Ulli’s Ayala around 6 p.m.
Calderon narrated that he was with his mother when he saw an employee “doing parade rest since 6 p.m.”
Calderon said he thought it was the owner discussing things with the worker “so we shrugged it off then continued roaming around.”
Curious to find out what was really happening, Calderon decided to intervene by approaching the person whom he thought was the owner that turned out to be Bacalso.
Calderon said he asked Bacalso to explain what was happening. He also asked Bacalso if he was owner or just a customer.
“The guy Jude sarcastically said na ‘Go ask him (referring to the server) what happened,’” said Calderon. “Then I asked the server unsay nahitabo and ingon sha ‘Natawag nako shag sir (I asked the server what happened and he said I called him sir).’”
Calderon said he pulled the male server to the staff room where he broke down into tears and appeared to have suffered a panic attack.
“At that time, naay (there were) customers dining in and clearly saw that this server was standing for 2 hours but no one was even curious to know why and what happened. The other employees sa (of) Ulli’s already tried to console in behalf sa (of the) server but this guy Jude won’t leave the server because of the sole reason that the server misgendered the guy Jude Bacalso,” said Calderon.
Bacalso allegedly asked something that the server was not able to answer.
Bacalso was supposedly heard telling the server: “Aw (Then) you will be standing there until makatubag ka sa akong pangutana (you can answer my question).”
Calderon said the server and his co-workers repeatedly apologized but Bacalso didn’t budge.
Calderon went on to admonish Bacalso in his Facebook post.
“Let me ask you – kinsa ka nga magpabarog og tawo just because of that mistake? Wala kay katungod mu treat og mga tawo sama sa imong gibuhat sa server na gipabarog nmo atubangan pajud sa imo for 2 hours. Daghan tawo nangagi sa Ulli’s imagine duol na sa entrance/exit. Bisan kinsa pa na ma-pobre or ma-datu wa kay katungod mu ingon ana kay tawo rana. Ikaw mismo kahibaw ka og asa ka gasugod dili ta mag hinilas. Wala lang jud ko naka video kay focus ko sa server na gahilak. (Who are you to let a person stand just because of that mistake? You don’t have the right to treat the person like what you did by letting him stand in front of you for two hours. There were so many people who passed by Ulili’s. Imagine it was near the entrance/exit. Whoever was involved, poor or rich, you don’t have the right to do that because he is only human. You yourself know where you started, do not be nasty. I wasn’t able to take a video because my focus was on the server who was crying),” said Calderon.
Calderon added that Bacalso’s actions were a big shame to the LGBTQ community.
“Also, you voicing for LGBTQ? For that mere mistake sa (of the) server, is that how you want to influence? Part (ko sa (I am part of the) LGBT myself and you bring shame sa atong (to our) community na grabe ka nakayatak sa katungod sa tawo (you trampled the rights of a person). I am calling you out and you being held accountable sa imong (of your) actions,” said Calderon, who added that he will not back down from Bacalso if they cross paths.
As of 4 p.m. on Tuesday, July 23, Calderon’s post drew 56,000 shares, 69,000 reactions, and 22,000 comments.
Some comments in Calderon’s post came from people who narrated their own supposed bad experience with Bacalso.
Ulli’s has issued two statements regarding the incident.
“Rest assured we are educating our people and placing their welfare of utmost priority. Likewise, we express our apologies to our guests. Your concerns are well noted and will help us move forward towards a better customer experience,” a part of Ulli’s first statement said.
In its second statement, Ulli’s said “it stands by our employee involved in the incident. He along with his teammates have our support.”
In his post, Bacalso said he has “sat down to quietly settle the matter with the restaurant management, one crew, and the store supervisor.”
The involved employee was not present during the meeting.
“My apologies also to the rest of the staff who are disheartened by the way things have escalated, as well as to the customers present at that time,” Bacalso said. “May we start here with, as the supervisor pointed out, an uphill path to reconciliation and we hope you will be able to allow us and yourselves to do so unhampered so we may all learn and heal from this.”
Bacalso’s posts drew 32,000 reactions, including 22,000 “haha” reactions, and 9,900 angry reactions as of posting time.