By José Abeto Zaide
The other day, we laid to rest Sonny and Flora’s first-born, John Noel Valencia. Fr. John Michael Arquero, vice rector of the Sons of Holy Mary Immaculate, offered the mass and provided the choir of the fraternity. Sonny and Flora have been supporting the Italian congregation, which seeks out urchins who may find priestly vocation.
After the mass a number shared memories of the dearly departed – among them Junjun Asuncion, who recalled best times with his bosom buddy Joel. Their moms were also best friends from college days. Mama La recalled between sobs the memory of her favorite son-in-law. The widow Liza held back tears to read the letter of her daughter Maritoni to her father. The son Anton acknowledged the tributes of those who spoke, and thanked everyone’s comforting presence in the family’s hour of bereavement.
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Maritoni is a full scholar freshman at University of St. Andrews in Fife, Scotland; (aka “St And,” and the alma mater of Kate Middleton and Prince William.) She wrote a farewell after speaking to her Papa, which her mother Liza shared with everyone:
“I am extremely saddened that I am unable to pay my final respects to Papa physically. So I thought the best thing I could do is share a few words for my Papa. Firstly, I hope Papa you can forgive me for not being there, at your bedside in the hospital and today.
“While our time together was short, the time that I did spend with Papa were all happy memories. I remember when I was a child he would treat me to places and drive me around. He would take me to a balloon party shop just so I could play with the toys. He would buy me treats just to fill my sweet tooth craving. They were sweet memories and my childhood was filled with these wonderful memories.
“Even when I was down, he would nurse me back to health. Like when I was hospitalized, he would sleep beside me and make sure I rested well and took my medicine. My father took care of me in his own way. All these exemplified that he cared for me. Now, I know that he will always look after me from the heavens. I have a lot of cheerful memories with my father and he will always be remembered as a cheerful, happy, and kind person to me.
“During the past few days, we have heard many stories about my father and since I am not physically here today, I would like to share a few words with the people who also truly cared for my father.
“To Grandma and Grandpa, honestly, I cannot even fathom what you are both going through. Papa never wanted to make you cry. Well, I think it is completely healthy to shed tears today, tomorrow, or even for the next week.
“Grandpa, I always saw you as a strong and brave man. Papa once told me that you were the foundation of the family. You were a source of strength for Papa. But true strength stems from vulnerability, so it’s okay to let your guard down and mourn. You can miss him but do let him go.
“Grandma, I can imagine you right now with your beautiful clothes and of course accessories. When I drove around with you, you would tell me funny stories of Papa’s childhood and that would bring a smile to both of our faces. I just hope that one day you will wear your best accessory – your smile.
“The days I saw you together with Papa were filled with light and happiness. I hope that you both remember those memories where we are all laughing. Grandpa and Grandma, you don’t only have each other – always remember that we are here for both of you – Kuya, Mama, and I.
“Kuya, thank you. I know there are days that Papa and I disagreed but you were always there to remind me how much I care for Papa and how much Papa cares for me. I’m sorry that I am not physically there for you right now, but thank you for representing the both of us and Mama. Thank you for organizing this whole event. Thank you for sleeping beside Papa’s side whenever he was at the hospital and during this wake. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to say my last words to him over the phone.”
Maritoni closed with a poem, “The Light,” which she wrote for her Papa, Joel:
The race is over. as the sun sets on the horizon line
No one expected the marathon
To be finished, in record time
The one in black, floats creepily
Reaping the light from the inside
Disappears with black smoke and white light
The shock and fear builds a wall of defense up in my mind
The misery and pain cloud my eyes
Slow streams, my mouth begins to open
Nothing but a silent voice
I lay still on my bed for what feels like eternity
I close my eyes, say hello to memory lane
Smiles in the pictures of my mind
Treats and sweets, hugs and piggy back rides
I smile.
I look up to ceiling to see a white light
My hand reaches up for it
Like grabbing a rope, pulling me up
I sit up, vertebrae by vertebrae, one foot after the other, Slowly but surely, I stand.
The white light smiles at me.
Just like he does.
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