Some years ago, I met a husband and wife whose marriage I had solemnized. “How’s your marriage going?” I asked. The husband smiled and said: “Father, I’ve discovered there are three rings in marriage. There’s the engagement ring, wedding ring, suffe-ring!” “There’s a fourth ring, Father,” the wife added. “Kung ang asawa ay may ‘tiri-ring’.” (If the spouse is a crackpot). * * * Although said jokingly, there’s a grain of truth there. Indeed, marriage — after all the flowers, the rich foods and drinks, the honeymoon — is not a bed of roses. However, if there’s sharing (another ring) between husband and wife, no doubt the marital burden becomes lighter. * * * Today is Holy Family Sunday. Jesus’ parents, Mary and Joseph, had their share of sufferings in rearing their child although they knew deep down that their Son was no ordinary child. For instance, the baby Jesus was in mortal danger because King Herod regarded Jesus as a threat to his political security (read this Sunday’s gospel, Matthew 2,19-23). The Holy Family had to flee to Egypt; hence, Jesus, Mary, and Joseph became “displaced persons.” * * * By becoming fully human, Christ entered through the family, thus sanctifying it. Likewise, God intended the family so that every child that comes into the world — helpless and fragile — would find warmth, care, love, and security. * * * A friend once confided to me, “The first thing I look for in a married man or woman is not how successful he or she is as lawyer, businessman, or professional but how successful as a family man or woman. * * * “If they fail in their family life, I consider them a complete failure.” Though the comment is rather strong, there’s some truth there. When one gets married, he or she assumes the responsibility of rearing the children they beget. That’s the couple’s vocation, and God’s plan for them is sacred and holy. * * * OBEDIENCE TO PARENTS. Similarly, the vocation of children is to honor, respect, and obey their parents. The very word FAMILY signifies “Father And Mother I Love You.” A mother was worried because her daughter was spending so much money buying costly perfumes. * * * One time she called her attention about it. “Mama, but my favorite perfume is ‘Gorgeous,’” the daughter said.” To which the mother replied, “My dear child, I wish they would make a perfume called ‘Obedience.’” * * * Parents are God’s cooperators and representatives. They are not gods, hence, imperfect. Despite this, children should honor, respect, and obey their parents since they are God’s representatives. Parents are expected constantly to show good example. * * * If the parents, for instance, are given to alcoholism, infidelity, quarreling and fighting, what can be expected of the children? Let’s pray for all parents and children. May they remember God’s plan for them and strive to live it every day. * * * LAUGH ONE ANOTHER. Once a young boy approached his father and asked: “Papa, how do wars begin? The father answered, “War begins when, for example, the USA attacks England, and it retaliates.” * * * The mother, who was within hearing distance, frowned and said: “How could that happen? USA and England are allies!” “But that’s just an example!” the husband growled. “And how do you expect a child to learn with wrong examples!” the wife shot back. * * * Irked, the husband replied, “Would you shut up!” “You should be the one to shut up!” the wife snapped. “What you’re teaching is wrong!” And the two shouted at one another. The son raised his voice and said: “Papa, Mama, that’s enough! Now I know how wars begin.” The story illustrates that intolerance of others’ opinions can cause conflicts and hurt feelings which take a long time to heal. * * * FAMILY TV MASS — is aired on 5PLUS Channel 59 at 6-7 a.m. every Sunday and on YouTube at 8 a.m. on “The Filipino Catholic.” Sponsor: HOLY FAMILY CHAPEL, Greenhills, Mandaluyong. Mass celebrant: FR. BEL SAN LUIS, SVD. The FAMILY that prays together stays together