Fake snake bite: A review of Anaconda 2025
For those who can recall the original 1997 film Anaconda, they’ll appreciate how this became a cult movie on the strength of its absurd premise and campy, awful acting. It starred Jennifer Lopez, Ice Cube, Jon Voight, with the stupidest accent that he kept forgetting he was putting on, a young Owen Wilson, and Eric Stoltz. The crazy thing is that it spawned several installments, as the film became a series shown in theaters and in made-for-television movies.
So fast forward to the present day, and writer-director Tom Gormican has co-written with Kevin Etten this newest iteration - one that can best be described as a meta-reboot. It follows a group of film nerds, who as young children made a monster home movie (a la Spielberg), and now are trying to film a remake of the original 1997 movie that they all loved so much.
Leading the pack is Griff (Paul Rudd), who claims to be an actor but has only cornered bit roles and walk-ons. Then there’s Doug (Jack Black), the group's director, reduced to being a wedding videographer to stay in the film world. Kenny (Steve Zahn) is the nominal cinematographer, but is there more to represent the friend that you can never depend on? Claire (Thandiwe Newton) was the girl whom Griff had crushed on, and is now a recently divorced housewife. These are the Gang of Four, who, believing Griff when he says he has the rights to the original Anaconda book, fly down to Brazil to try and capture that last vestige of glory.
On the Amazon, they encounter Carlos (Selton Mello), a local snake handler and the bona fide scene stealer of the film. And there’s Ana (Daniela Melchor), a young woman on the run, with seemingly very hostile hombres running after her; and she insinuates herself as the riverboat captain of the four, in order to escape her pursuers. Look out for the cameos that occur, and the one hint is to remember who was in the original cast of the 1997 film - and keep your eyes peeled.
The film is harmless, has its hilarious moments, and has its own doggy charm in spinning out the formula narrative. After the original meta-introduction, you know the beats of the second half of the film will turn the film into an adventure of a lifetime for our intrepid quartet.
It’s this constant shifting of tones that keeps the film outing from really being put on a snaky scale! In this reboot, the intent far outweighs the execution. The chemistry between Rudd and Black is palpable. Beyond going for the worst hairstyle of the year, Newton adds a light-hearted, touchy-feely element to the film. Zahn is out to be that cliched annoying friend, who still has a heart of gold when push comes to shove.
It’s an hour and 40 minutes of ‘themes’ as Griff and Doug would say. There’s no intergenerational drama here, but there are themes of tested friendship, of subjugating egos, and holding on to the Dream. If you enter the theater with no real expectations, you’re likely to be diverted and charmed. You will think, though, that it could have been so much more, and the sad fact is that this reboot will not become a cult classic. For that, you really have to treat yourself to the 1997 original.