Cate Blanchett is an accomplished actress with two Oscars, four BAFTAs, and four Golden Globes, to name some of the accolades this Australian actress and producer has on her mantelpiece. So, I’m perplexed to find her leading the cast of Borderlands, a video-game film adaptation, is one big understatement. I’ve even dug up how she reunites with Director Eli Roth in this film, as they worked together in The House With a Clock In Its Walls. But it still befuddles why she’d waste her time on this Borderlands film project - unless she were egged on by her children, who love the video game.

In a world before Guardians of the Galaxy, before Mandalorian, this mash-up of Blade Runner, Mad Max, and the Goonies might have made sense. Plus, there are millions who have been playing the game since it debuted in 2009. My middle son, now 30, fondly remembers the game - how it mixed sniper/shooting gallery action with humor and colorful characters. And I do see how the casting dies play it faithful to the game. 

But from the very start of the film, Everything feels like a retread, like it’s been exhumed and stitched together to feel like some new Frankenstein monster. But as patched up and reconstituted as it is, the film is a monstrous bore and misfire. I sincerely doubt that even the diehard fans of the game will think this a decent film adaptation of the game. There are sequences at the halfway mark that try to replicate the video game action, but it comes a bit too late in the day, as we’ve already given up on the film. 

Blanchett is Lilith, the bounty hunter, and main protagonist of the film, while Kevin Hart is Roland, a mercenary and the one with the funny quips… or so he thinks - as most of the jokes fall flat. Jack Black voices Claptrap, this film’s R2-D2. And Arianna Greenblatt is Tiny Tina, the central character to the plot development of the narrative. Jamie Lee Curtis is on board as a reclusive scientist with a link to Lilith and Lilith’s mother.

The action generally occurs on the Planet Pandora and involves a hidden vault. 

It’s Mad Max meets Mandalorian, Dune meets Guardian, but without any of the originality, folklore, resonance, or intriguing characters of any of those four films.  

I sincerely hope Cate took home a tidy talent fee for this film. I know she’s also dipped her ‘wings’ in IPs like Thor, Lord of the Rings, and How to Train Your Dragon, but those gave her exciting roles that we still remember fondly. This one is utterly forgettable.