When Dr. Ivan Misner, founder of Business Networking International (BNI), enters a networking room, he often asks the audience how many of them are trying to sell something. Without fail, everyone raises their hand.

However, Misner identifies this as a major “disconnect” in networking. 

“Never try to sell something in a networking event,” he advised. “Instead, try to establish and build relationships. That is where the magic begins."

Misner made his first visit to the Philippines from July 5 to 6 to speak at the BNI Philippines National Conference, an event commemorating the 10th anniversary of BNI in the country.

As a bestselling author and recognized by Forbes and Entrepreneur magazines as the “Father of Modern Networking,” Misner delivered a 40-minute talk titled “Networking for Success” to an audience of nearly 300 business executives.

“After 24 hours of meeting someone, send them a text message or an email thanking them. Gratitude is powerful. After seven days of the networking event, reach out and try to get to know the other person better. And after 30 days, try to get a one-on-one meeting." 

Dr. Ivan Misner, founder of Business Networking International

During his talk, Misner stressed the importance of networking as a critical skill for business success. 

“I once conducted a survey of 12,000 business executives and asked them about the important factors for their success. And 91.5 percent of the respondents pointed to networking as a key to success. How often do you get 91 percent of the people to agree on one thing?” he shared.

Despite its significance, Misner noted that networking is rarely taught in business schools. 

“It is just like sales, no one teaches it in school,” he remarked, highlighting that networking is often considered a “soft science” and overlooked by “full-time, tenured university professors.” 

He added, “The sad part is these full-time and tenured professors never ran a business in their life.”

50 Years of Building Relationships

It has been more than 50 years since Misner thought of the idea behind BNI. It was 1983 when Misner launched a management consulting business. A year later, a critical client chose not to renew their contract, leaving Misner in urgent need of new business. Since his consulting practice thrived on speaking engagements and referrals, he sought a method to amplify his referral network.

The BNI founder revealed that existing networking groups at that time either leaned too social or were overly sales-focused, neither of which facilitated substantial business growth. 

"I went to some groups but most of them were sales-focused," Misner recalls. "They would just sell to you. Hardcore business. I would walk away from those meetings feeling like I was slimed."

On the other hand, purely social groups were equally ineffective for business networking. "It was happy hour and hors d'oeuvres. There was very little business done," he remembers.

Determined to find a better way, he envisioned a group of trusted acquaintances, blending business with genuine relationships. This concept was grounded in the philosophy of giving first—a principle that would become “Givers Gain,” the cornerstone of BNI.

The first informal meeting for BNI took place in December 1984, followed by the inaugural official meeting on January 8, 1985. The idea resonated with his friends, who appreciated the merger of business and relationship-building, unified by the “Givers Gain” philosophy—helping others to help oneself.

"The glue that would hold it all together is this philosophy of Givers Gain; this idea that if I help you, you’ll help me, and we’ll all do better as a result,"  Misner said.

Advice to Entrepreneurs

Labeled as the Father of Networking by both Forbes and Entrepreneur magazines, Misner has several pieces of invaluable advice to Filipino entrepreneurs. 

His first piece of advice is to invest in changing mindset rather than just investing on their skillset. According to Misner, mindset is crucial as it influences everything an entrepreneur does.

“The right mindset for networking is not to focus on selling,” he says. “Don’t go to a networking event trying to sell. And don’t be a card dealer. Don’t go there distributing your business card.”

Instead, Misner urges Filipino entrepreneurs to focus on establishing and nurturing relationships, like a farmer cultivating his crops. 

“You are a farmer, not a hunter. After 24 hours of meeting someone, send them a text message or an email thanking them. Gratitude is powerful. After seven days of the networking event, reach out and try to get to know the other person better. And after 30 days, try to get a one-on-one meeting,” he advised.

Misner also observes that women tend to excel in networking more than men because they are natural relationship builders.

"Women are more successful in networking and it is no surprise that they are also more successful in selling," he says. 

10 Years of BNI in the Philippines

The BNI Philippines National Conference  marked a significant milestone for networking in the country. 

National Director Dexter Ortega highlighted BNI Philippines' growth, noting that the organization now boasts 44 chapters across 14 regions in Luzon, Visayas, and Mindanao, with over 1,550 members. 

From a small group that gathered in Ortigas Center in 2014, BNI Philippines has grown to over 1,500 members and achieved an impressive record of more than P12 billion in closed business referrals.

Ortega, a certified public accountant and auditor, said he has found in BNI his "passion, platform, and purpose" which is to help people succeed. 

"In BNI, our first greeting is always, 'How can I help you?' And it has become my passion and puroose in life," he says. 

Ortega noted that BNI Philippines' vision is to become the largest business referral organization where members refer or endorse each other's products and services to others. 

"By helping entrepreneurs, we eventually help families that depend on the businesses of our members. And by helping families, we eventually lift the economy of our country," says Ortega.