IT'S THE SMALL THINGS

Just when you least expect it, life will always catch you by surprise. It will throw you an unexpected curve ball, and unfortunately, sometimes, when it rains, it truly pours. As we get older, we learn to pick our battles – with others, with ourselves, with our feelings, our emotions – and we realize that not everything is worth fighting for. But what do you do when out of the blue, the battle just picks you? This, I realize, is when you end up resorting to the very morals and values you were raised with. This invisible shield that will keep your thoughts going and churning at night even if your physical exhaustion and stress needs you to be asleep. It is always the choice between doing what is rational, versus acting rashly and on emotions – the latter of which is always instinctive, and in the past, I have learned, has gotten me into unnecessary trouble.
Silence speaks volumes. At the end of the day, nothing said, nothing done. Every action elicits a reaction, which is why, we must be considerate about the decisions we make, and be mindful of its potential impact on others. Everything happens for a reason.

Challenging situations are also the greatest revelations of characters – that of others, and of oneself. Someone’s stubbornness for instance, can translate into selfishness, and that can ultimately reveal your seemingly infinite patience you did not know existed. As hard as these moments can be, we try our best to turn them into opportunities for growth. It is when we are pushed to our limits that our strongest support systems are formed, and it is when the ones who matter come forward.
In the same manner, it is those who are closest to you that have the capacity to hurt you the most. Promises are made to be kept, and when broken, the trust that took years – sometimes a lifetime – to build can be shattered in a matter of minutes. Many times, the pain is so great, it is numbing. But when compounded by Murphy’s Law, an emotional breakthrough reminds you that at the end of what can be the most harrowing of days, you are still human – one whose annoyances and frustrations can translate to hurt, and that as part of overcoming and moving on, you must feel this pain. And then right at that moment when you feel like your cup has overflowed, and the universe cannot give you more, the greatest of surprises is it can, and it does. And just when you think you are calloused, it turns out you are at your breaking point. Crying heals. At the end of the day, it is not a sign of weakness I have come to realize, but an act of purifying oneself when emotions overwhelm. It is the purest and most natural form of coping – our body’s natural mechanism to rid ourselves (even just temporarily) of stresses and anger. Then we carry on, and we learn to surrender.
At the end of the day, God will never give you more than you can bear – even on the most exhausting of days when you seemingly feel like a pin cushion of bad luck. He values those who soldier on in solid faith. At your melting point, you are most vulnerable, and there is no question that love is so powerful, it has the capacity to let you see through, make exceptions, and provide breakthrough moments you would otherwise probably beat yourself up for. The power of love makes you ponder and overthink, but it also hurts you in ways inexplicable. And in moving on, only when we learn to transform that pain into something purposeful can, and do we realize our own power. It is important to be mindful, always. But till then, we surrender. After all, “We love because He first loved us” (John 4:19).