MEDIUM RARE 

Belinda, as I named her in my book, Etiquette for Mistresses, appears in the last page, not as the last of her tribe but because of her closing statement: “When he dies and turns into a corpse, that’s the time to give him back to his wife and children. It’s the only dignified way to tell yourself: ‘This is the end.’”  

Decades later -- pandemic, the death of her Benny (not his real name) who was my friend before he introduced Belinda to our little group – it was time for a catch-up. We met for lunch, during which Belinda was every inch the caring, solicitous, perfect mistress, a role model. She kept pushing the food at me and urged me to eat, eat more so we could take home more leftovers.

She was well-dressed, as usual, in contrast to my shirt-cum-jeans look. Belinda wore a real dress in gray and navy, a shawl in the same elegant shades held by a long vertical pearl pin on one shoulder. My son who dropped me off for our date was to tell me later, “Maganda siya” (She’s beautiful). Which is as it should be. Who wants a shabby woman to call his mistress?

On her own, Belinda has always been a lady of means. After she retired from the multinational company where she worked on product research and development, she carried on with her line of expertise and produced her own unbranded snacks, chips, and the like. She was also consultant to at least two restaurants. In other words, she has not been idle. What free time she has is spent traveling, usually with Judy (not her real name), her and Benny’s love child.

“It wasn’t easy being a mistress,” Belinda whispered aloud across the table. “That’s what I kept telling Judy when she was growing up. I told her and I told her, ‘Don’t do as your mother did’.” With self-deprecating humor, she recalled the many times she would rush Benny to the hospital and nurse him back to health in her house, return him to his wife, then back to the hospital, etc.      

No, Judy has not followed in her mother’s footsteps. She’s happily married, with children calling the ex-mistress their lovely and devoted Lola.