Christmas in my parent's house
Published Dec 25, 2022 12:05 am
DRIVING THOUGHTS
Pinky Concha Colmenares
My happy link to yesterday is Christmas Eve.
While kids spend the hours to Christmas Eve looking at the gifts under the tree, many grandparents like me take the time to reminisce about past Christmases, which is always my happy link to yesterday. I come from a large clan who mostly lived in one neighborhood, but each family always celebrated Christmas Eve in their house. It was on Christmas Day when we all came together – from lunch to dinner to after-dinner snacks.
In our house, the hours before Christmas Eve were for the preparation of noche buena. My mother’s silverware would be cleaned and set on the long dining table, beside her lovely dinnerware, on an intricately-embroidered tablecloth that comes out only on special occasions. It’s an occasion too when we had to be very mindful of our table manners (so we do not spill food or drink on the tablecloth!).
She’d simmer the ham all night, and turn off the fire only when we leave for Christmas Eve mass. So we would all smell like ham sauce but no one ever made a comment on that, afraid that she would stop cooking her ham, which she prepared from cleaning a pork leg, bathing it in herbs – a long process that took days and tasted really good! I remember that friends who were privileged to be gifted with that ham would later try to convince her to make one for their families.
After mass, we gathered around the dining table, ate fast, and then opened the presents, a riotous activity as gleeful “ohs!” and “thank you’s” are said in between lots of teasing. A kid who said he didn’t know what to ask from Santa would be given a gift box with the most simple thing, like a comb. Now I think that was a mean thing to do on Christmas Eve because the kid would cry, but all of them survived the disappointment. I think that taught the kids to speak their minds, and their Christmas wishes.
The ritual of opening gifts became longer as more grandchildren joined the family (we are five siblings, all married with children). It stretched on till early morning because each toy had to be played, and each dress had to be fitted so it could be exchanged the following day in case it was not the proper size. (My mother said that a gift should not be “for tomorrow” when one is taller or bigger.) The end of Christmas Eve was a cup of thick chocolate drink.
When my family moved to Manila, I replicated each Christmas ritual in my house, between work and deadlines. In the past week, I watched my daughters run the traditions of preparing for Christmas Eve. They did not miss a step. It’s like I’m walking through my mother’s house at this time of the year. I have passed on tradition.
***
Christmas Day is finally here after the 100-day countdown started in the shopping malls (to remind us of the gift-giving tradition); and three months after welcoming the “Ber-months” when Sept. 1 rolled in. And of course that welcome was led by Jose Mari Chan’s “Christmas in Our Hearts,” the adopted holiday theme song.
How Christmas Day will unravel today will be an interesting study on how people are re-entering the rituals of tradition.
Will guests around the table include friends or only family? Despite the easing of restrictions, many families are still wary of inviting friends to their homes because that means staying with them for hours, without masks, talking, dining, and drinking and laughing through the day. If the family has small children, should they allow their kids to sit with guests?
Of course, children will receive gifts today! But will that be given to them face-to-face by aunts, uncles, godparents or friends? In the past two years, delivery riders were “Santa’s elves” delivering gifts.
Will the traditional kiss on the cheek, or the hand, be with a “Merry Christmas” greeting? Should you offer a taste of good ensaymada to a friend after you’ve bitten a part of that, and will it be considered rude to decline?
A new chapter in the books on good manners should present the proper and accepted behavior for many of our traditions, especially the one related to “close contact.”
I wish you all a Merry Christmas!
Pinky Concha Colmenares
My happy link to yesterday is Christmas Eve.
While kids spend the hours to Christmas Eve looking at the gifts under the tree, many grandparents like me take the time to reminisce about past Christmases, which is always my happy link to yesterday. I come from a large clan who mostly lived in one neighborhood, but each family always celebrated Christmas Eve in their house. It was on Christmas Day when we all came together – from lunch to dinner to after-dinner snacks.
In our house, the hours before Christmas Eve were for the preparation of noche buena. My mother’s silverware would be cleaned and set on the long dining table, beside her lovely dinnerware, on an intricately-embroidered tablecloth that comes out only on special occasions. It’s an occasion too when we had to be very mindful of our table manners (so we do not spill food or drink on the tablecloth!).
She’d simmer the ham all night, and turn off the fire only when we leave for Christmas Eve mass. So we would all smell like ham sauce but no one ever made a comment on that, afraid that she would stop cooking her ham, which she prepared from cleaning a pork leg, bathing it in herbs – a long process that took days and tasted really good! I remember that friends who were privileged to be gifted with that ham would later try to convince her to make one for their families.
After mass, we gathered around the dining table, ate fast, and then opened the presents, a riotous activity as gleeful “ohs!” and “thank you’s” are said in between lots of teasing. A kid who said he didn’t know what to ask from Santa would be given a gift box with the most simple thing, like a comb. Now I think that was a mean thing to do on Christmas Eve because the kid would cry, but all of them survived the disappointment. I think that taught the kids to speak their minds, and their Christmas wishes.
The ritual of opening gifts became longer as more grandchildren joined the family (we are five siblings, all married with children). It stretched on till early morning because each toy had to be played, and each dress had to be fitted so it could be exchanged the following day in case it was not the proper size. (My mother said that a gift should not be “for tomorrow” when one is taller or bigger.) The end of Christmas Eve was a cup of thick chocolate drink.
When my family moved to Manila, I replicated each Christmas ritual in my house, between work and deadlines. In the past week, I watched my daughters run the traditions of preparing for Christmas Eve. They did not miss a step. It’s like I’m walking through my mother’s house at this time of the year. I have passed on tradition.
***
Christmas Day is finally here after the 100-day countdown started in the shopping malls (to remind us of the gift-giving tradition); and three months after welcoming the “Ber-months” when Sept. 1 rolled in. And of course that welcome was led by Jose Mari Chan’s “Christmas in Our Hearts,” the adopted holiday theme song.
How Christmas Day will unravel today will be an interesting study on how people are re-entering the rituals of tradition.
Will guests around the table include friends or only family? Despite the easing of restrictions, many families are still wary of inviting friends to their homes because that means staying with them for hours, without masks, talking, dining, and drinking and laughing through the day. If the family has small children, should they allow their kids to sit with guests?
Of course, children will receive gifts today! But will that be given to them face-to-face by aunts, uncles, godparents or friends? In the past two years, delivery riders were “Santa’s elves” delivering gifts.
Will the traditional kiss on the cheek, or the hand, be with a “Merry Christmas” greeting? Should you offer a taste of good ensaymada to a friend after you’ve bitten a part of that, and will it be considered rude to decline?
A new chapter in the books on good manners should present the proper and accepted behavior for many of our traditions, especially the one related to “close contact.”
I wish you all a Merry Christmas!