THROUGH UNTRUE

The Vatican document “Fiducia Supplicans” has ignited a heated debate concerning the propriety of blessing couples in “irregular, illicit, or immoral unions.” Those who refuse to grant this blessing argue that doing so implies approval of and support for unions characterized by a habitual refusal to repent, effectively legitimizing and perpetuating their sinful state.

However, may we not also presume that some couples in such unions earnestly seek God’s blessing, not to gain Church approval, but to fortify their resolve to leave their past behind and embark on a new path? They might have realized that their unions have ensnared them in a cocoon of guilt and shame, perceiving their way of life as a self-imposed prison. They mirror the disciples of Jesus, who, in the aftermath of their betrayal, retreated to a small room and “locked all doors” (John 20:19), only to discover that they could not lock Jesus out. For, Jesus was never outside.

When Jesus wants us to experience His loving presence, He usually does not come from the outside. He springs forth from within, reminding us that He is closer to us than we are to ourselves. Even in our gloomiest and darkest nights, God meets us where we are. He comes as the Spirit that enables us to cope with every past failure and sin, transforming us into a new creation. Many couples seek to be blessed in the hope of experiencing this life-changing transformation.

Recall the gospel story of the adulterous woman brought to Jesus by the Pharisees and scribes. They aimed to use the law to condemn her to death (John 8:1-11). Recognizing their motives, Jesus responded by transforming hatred into understanding, heartless legalism into compassion, and denunciation into forgiveness. Instead of condemning the woman, Jesus offered her the chance to break free from her past and create a better future. This merciful act by Jesus serves as a model for addressing individuals whose lives have been unfairly defined by their sordid past, depriving them of the chance to improve.

However, Jesus also issued a crucial command to the woman: “Go and sin no more” (John 8:11). A fresh start necessitates breaking free from a former way of life, old habits, obsessions, and addictions that imprison and enslave us.

The blessing envisioned by “Fiducia Supplicans” does not seek to legitimize sinful unions or excuse wrongdoing. Rather, it fortifies the couple's belief that, with a genuine desire for positive change, God's grace can initiate a transformative process.

It is likely that many couples in such unions will resist this initiative. They may reason: “We have been living like this for so long now. We can't help it. We were born this way.” While they insist on their inability to change, they may be comforted to know that God does not perceive them as they perceive themselves.

Unlike our partial and categorizing human judgment, divine judgment is grounded in God’s penetrating yet merciful understanding of our uniqueness. God sees us not as we see ourselves but as His children, endowed with boundless grace to start anew, improve, and become the persons He wants us to be.