IT'S THE SMALL THINGS
And just like that, my baby turned one. He is now a toddler. I did not expect to be one of those who would get sentimental over time, but now I know exactly what is meant by I wish life had a “pause” button. To say they grow too fast would be an understatement. One day you have them on a sleep-feed-burp-poop-cycle, and the next, they are exploring the world with their full force curiosity ready to take it on with their first few steps. While there is so much to say that it would be impossible to write them all down at once, here is my first attempt at chronicling all my emotions, in the hopes of being able to let a new mom know that she too is doing just fine.
Speaking of emotions, motherhood is a roller coaster of such, not to mention the hormones settling in. It is a whirlwind of every kind of feeling that exists under the sun. From sheer joy and bliss one day, to the most heightened paranoia the next. Motherhood, I have come to realize, is non-stop worrying — it just evolves. Perhaps you are more cautious with your first, but it is also your first that becomes your greatest teacher. You learn the most, you modify, you discover a love within yourself so great that it keeps on giving — the kind that never runs out even when you know you have been burning a candlestick from both ends.
Motherhood teaches you to appreciate the most mundane of things, even the most basic of survival instincts like your baby being able to breathe and eat properly. There is no right or wrong formula in how to mother (or parent) properly, but you will soon realize that you gravitate toward your roots and how you were raised (with a few modifications here and there) because really, it is what you know — it is a safe space in a world that is ever so new.
They often say “it takes a village to raise a child.” My advice is: use your village, every person, and every resource in it. It is also okay to keep within your village because sometimes too many cooks will spoil your broth. Choose wisely, and discern who to listen to, and who truly means well. With that, you will learn to shut off the noise. Your priorities change drastically alongside motherhood as well, and all of a sudden, you are able to relate to other mothers at an instant. There is nothing will not do for your child and there will still be days you will find yourself in disbelief that this incredible human being came from you.