IT’S THE SMALL THINGS
Alex Eduque
I write this on the 100th birthday of someone very special to me. My grand-aunt, Consuelo “Chito” Madrigal. Last year, I wrote a memoir of sorts as a tribute to her to celebrate this milestone which was published by the Ateneo de Naga University press. On the occasion of her one 100th birthday, we received the news that the book has been invited to be featured at Filipino American International Book Festival this coming October, to be hosted by the Philippine American Writers and Artists (PAWA) together with the San Francisco Library. Truly, even in heaven, she is making sure that her legacy is continued and that she is remembered. So today, I am sharing with you but snippets and tidbits from this memoir, in the hopes that you consider getting a copy for yourself as well to support the work of the Consuelo “Chito” Madrigal Foundation (CCMF) Bikol, whose work is extensively written about in the book as well.
“The ones who truly love you, will never say goodbye.” These words were told to me in consolation by my grand-aunt, Consuelo “Chito” Madrigal, in her aims of comforting me, one afternoon, when she decided to let me know she was battling with the big C. She said she knew my mom and some of my aunts who were caring for her had decided among themselves that it would be best to keep it a secret from her, but being the proactive woman that she was, she found a way to confirm and find the truth. She played along with them because their care and compassion meant the world to her.
She was that kind of person. Brutally honest, but caring, nurturing and a total empathy. Acknowledged acts of service and lived a grateful life. Her strength and resilience was revered by many. Her sheer presence was larger than life, and she had her own distinct way of making all those blessed enough to know her feel loved
Tita Coko – as we fondly called her – thrived in the company of people, and paved the path to the success of many. She welcomed people of all sorts, from all backgrounds into her home and life. On a personal note, I have not had a relationship with anyone remotely close to mine with her. Having visited her every single day since I was born, for 18 years, I sought comfort in her company and found refuge in her home many times. She doted on me like a grandmother would, but also made sure I was accountable for my actions. She made sure I was aware and knew the truth – no matter how challenging or dire – in many instances and situations. She knew when to inspire my confidence, but she also knew when to put me in my place. She knew how to live life to the fullest, but she also knew how to give back wholeheartedly. To her, that was life’s greatest blessing.
“With privileges, comes responsibility.” These words were inculcated in me ever since I can remember. And because she was blessed, she was one great blessing. Not only to me, and to the family, but to the lives of so many others. Charity, she would say, always begins at home, and I was witness to that growing up. Her home was always a venue to give back – whether to raise funds and awareness for the arts and cultural concerns, concerts to recognize local talent and artists, or even a simple lunch with some priests who would present to her the work they are doing for their community and parish – she would readily accept people and help out causes that resonated with her.
Family to her was everything, and she truly looked out for the welfare of all. Many times over, until today, I ask myself “What would Tita Coko have said?” In many ways, she was the moral compass and guide book of so many of us. She was ahead of her time and despite her many blessings, was someone who delighted in and cherished the small things. Today, her foundation has changed the lives of thousands, and I am sure she is smiling down from heaven with extreme honor and gratefulness to these families for allowing her, through her legacy and mission, into their lives. As I look back and reminisce, as beautiful and as sad a thought as it may be, I realize that the love she blessed me with is a kind of love I will never have again. Her boundless love to this day knows no ends, and I continue to not only feel it, but experience it when I expect it the least. After all, “The ones who truly love you, will never say goodbye.”
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