THROUGH UNTRUE
Fr. Rolando V. dela Rosa, O.P.
Many men subscribe to an extreme notion of masculinity that emphasizes aggression, brute power, and machismo. They project themselves as brave men who don't cry, don't run from a fight, and can instill fear in others by an implicit threat of violence.
But by so doing, they actually submit themselves to a sociocultural norm that requires men to always assume the posture of a tough guy. You often hear it said: "Boys will be boys, and to be a man necessarily excludes any show of weakness." So boys grow up with a distorted understanding of maleness based on toxic masculinity.
One characteristic of toxic masculinity is coarseness of language. One government official, for instance, constantly indulges in profanity while delivering speeches or conducting interviews. He peppers his monologues with curses and threats to distract us from his inability to formulate and express his thoughts logically and clearly.
Many politicians and government officials follow his lead, and even do worse. After seizing power, they steal government funds with impunity, decimate their enemies, and perpetuate themselves in office through their spouses, children, and relatives.
Toxic masculinity is reinforced by many film and television celebrities, as well as singers who cannot finish a sentence or a song without uttering a bad word.Young people idolize and imitate them, creating a reversal of standards in society that leads to moral depravity and the gradual loss of our sense of shame.
Being shameless is fashionable for many tough guys. They are no longer bothered by the possibility of being exposed for crimes they commit. In fact, like self-confessed exhibitionists, they delight in seeing their faults, defects, or crimes broadcast by the media. After all, they are certain of not being punished because other tough guys in power will surely absolve them.
For sure, there are many men, real men, who do not feel the need to flaunt their machismo. I remember St. John Paul II's visit to the Philippines in 1995. At the age of 75, he looked frail, weak, and powerless, but millions of Filipinos lined up in the streets and waited for hours to see him because he had something that commanded respect and obedience — AUTHORITY, which is the ability to move and influence people not by force or fear, but by his credibility and integrity. Men who boast of their toxic masculinity often do not have authority, just raw power.
Our gospel reading today also talks about another good model of authentic masculinity. John the Baptist exemplifies true manliness, devoid of toxic machismo. Great crowds went out to listen to him in the desert because he exuded a virtue that every real man must have:HUMILITY.
Jesus declared that no man born of a woman was greater than John the Baptist (Luke 7:28).People who listened to his preaching extolled him, thinking that he was the messiah, but he described himself simply as "unworthy to unstrap the sandals of Jesus" (Matthew 1:7).
What further characterized his masculinity was his FIDELITY to his God-given mission—to be the voice that proclaimed the coming of the messiah. There were many shrill sounds that tried to silence him. He was even imprisoned and beheaded by Herod. But up to the end, he proved a real man: one who can make a decision and stand by it no matter what happens.
St. John the Baptist was pious and religious. Many people think these are unmanly qualities. Yet, he showed the way for other men who sought authentic masculine holiness. He was unashamed to pray in public, to preach what he believed, and to practice what he preached.
We need more men with masculine spirituality today, men imbued with authority and humility, who are faithful in their religious duties and commitments, and take the lead in his family's path to sanctity.