‘The elves are unionized and have quite the benefits. Hot cocoa available at all hours, protection against hungry polar bears, and they are adequately paid for in candy canes.’
How does Santa Claus prepare for the biggest night of the year?
A chat with the jolly old man up North
At a glance
Images from Freepik
Every December in the North Pole, it’s as busy as it gets at Santa Claus’ workshop. As elves rush around, trying to meet the year’s quota, Mrs. Claus is busy overseeing the final entries to the naughty or nice list whereas Frosty makes sure the snow conditions are just right. In the back shed, the reindeer are warming up for yet another big night. We’ve been granted a quick moment to sit down with Santa Claus himself to see just how he readies himself for Christmas Eve.
It seems time has gone by so fast, how many presents do you have ready to go for this year?
Ho, now let’s see, if we account for every child that hasn’t done anything naughty up until the cut-off period, we have around three billion presents ready to go for every child in the world. For any extra presents, we either save them for next year or hand them over to the Easter Bunny.
You’re friends with the Easter Bunny?
Quite close, same goes for the Tooth Fairy and the Sandman. We all help each other out when the going gets rough. Mostly for when we’re understaffed on certain holidays. New trends tend to come and go, we always try to keep up with the times by having a yearly meeting.
How about the elves? What’s it like running such a big operation?
The elves are unionized and have quite the benefits. Hot cocoa available at all hours, protection against hungry polar bears, and they are adequately paid for in candy canes. They’re quite excited each year and take the challenges head on.
What challenges do you often face this time of year?
Once we had a problem with the snow, my reindeer couldn’t quite make it through. Luckily the elves found a new recruit to help us with this problem. A young reindeer named Rudolph who has a bright red nose to guide us through the night.
What is your response to the allegations that you don’t deliver presents to children in troubled areas?
We honestly try our best. It’s just a shame that some countries are too stubborn to set aside their differences and think about the children. If I had the power to stop all conflict, I would. But Christmas magic can only go so far. It has to come from the hearts of people to make the change they want to see. Peace on earth, now that’s the Christmas wish I’ve had ever since.
How do you feel about religious people claiming you hog the spotlight during Christmas when it’s supposed to celebrate Jesus’ birth?
Who do you think gave the three wise men those presents to give to him in the manger? In all seriousness, he was the one that inspired me to start all this. Early on, when I was making toys for fun, he was the first to suggest I should give them to children, especially to poor kids, to bring them joy.
What is your message to the children of the world this year for Christmas?
No matter how hard it may seem, always be kind to others, even to those who are mean to you. Often when children are naughty, this is simply because they are misguided or are dealing with something. As my good friend once preached, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”