Nadine Lustre on closure, cancel culture

Published November 15, 2021, 11:35 AM

by Stephanie Bernardino

Nadine Lustre recently opened up about the things she went through after her breakup with longtime partner James Reid.

In an interview on husband-and-wife musicians Jim Bacarro and Saab Magalona’s podcast, the 28-year-old actress-singer admitted that it took her a while before she got over her almost four years of relationship with James.

“I was pretty much in limbo for like more than a year,” she related.

Then she gave some advice to those people who might be going through the same thing.

According to her, one should just take his or her time.

“I mean, it’s not, you know, wounds wouldn’t heal that easily. It will take time. But I mean it’s super worth it in the end,” she assured.

As for how she coped up, Nadine revealed doing all the things she couldn’t do before.

She also did so many reflections.

“All the things that I’ve done, the person I’ve become, it’s like I was having conversations with myself,” was how she put it, relating being stuck at home due to the pandemic also helped.

“I was trying to get to know myself again, as an individual, just because it’s really different than you’re with another person. You’re a different person, but when you’re on your own it’s also different.”

“So it’s like it’s like meeting Nadine again for the first time and I’m doing the things that I haven’t done before that I’ve always wanted to do for the first time.”

Nadine credited her friends for helping her a lot.

“Just because at least I have someone to vent to, like, all my emotions. I was just pouring it on someone. I was cooking. I was doing flower arrangements. I was watching series, painting, just anything that I have always wanted to do, but didn’t have time to do or didn’t have the chance to.”

More than anything, Nadine reminded heartbroken people not to rush it.

“Just take it slow,” she reiterated.

As for her, Nadine just woke up one day and it wasn’t there anymore.

“It was really weird because of course like there were times na parang I was like ‘f*ck,’ like, you know, I wish this would still work out. Like, you know, you’re still there. You’re still not over the relationship. But then I was aware that it was slowly going away. And at first, it was hard for me just because I was, like, ‘This couldn’t happen.’ You know, like, this can’t go away because I still want to be with this person. But one day I just woke up and then I told my friends that, you know what, it’s not there anymore.”

“It’s just that sometimes, that happens. And sometimes it happens, like, it took a while because I needed to realize that I needed to put myself first. That’s why… but then when I realized that and when I decided you know to put myself first it just went out the window.”

Meanwhile, Nadine also tackled how fed up she is with those people dipping their fingers in her personal life.

“I still try to be nice but there are times when I’m like, you know, yung nagpipintig yung tenga mo when someone says something that you don’t agree with. It’s like, ‘Excuse me?’ Like, ‘Are you really saying this right?’ It really like… I snap, I really snap.”

Then Nadine recalled how she snapped some years ago when she was asked about her then-live-in situation with James.

“I thought it was very rude for them to ask me about my living situation and it’s very personal. It was a very personal question and the thing is, like, I don’t like it when people try to interfere with my personal stuff, especially if it’s something that, you know, a normal person would get offended with,” she said.

“I mean, if someone asks you na like ‘Totoo ba na nag li-live in kayo ni ganyan?’ It’s very rude. You know, and I never understood why people could just do that to public figures but like, for, you know, people who are not in the industry, parang they have more respect. I think that’s also why me just not giving a d*mn started – was because I can see how people treated celebrities,” she added.

“Like, I know how people see us in a way na parang they can just bash us online without even caring. They can just say whatever hurtful things to us and I mean, you know, we’re are used to it, but at the same time, it’s like, we’re still human.”

She pointed out how there are new artists that are not used to those things.

“Especially the young ones who are just new in the showbiz industry,” Nadine said. “Like, I feel really bad when they get bashed because, you know, they’re not used to it. And somehow it could affect how they perceive themselves, how do they feel about themselves? Because that happened to me when I was starting. That really happened to me, like, I was so insecure. I wanted a lot of changes in my personality and how I dress, how I looked. I wish I was like this, I wish I was like that. But then as I grew older, I realized, like, that’s not me, that’s what people want for me. But then why should I care what people say about me? I’m me!”

In terms of her bashers, Nadine reiterated that she’s not the type of person that people can just put down.

“That doesn’t work for me. Like other celebrities wouldn’t mind – which is okay. You know, that’s how they handle things. But me kasi , I like… It’s not that I like proving a point, it’s just that I like, in a way answering so that people will would stop doing this to others.”

She maintained the importance of setting the boundaries as a public figure. Then explained her recent exchanged tweet with a basher who mocked her figure.

“Pretty much that person was saying that I was gaining weight. You know, I’m starting to look like a ball. And you know what, I am gaining weight because food in Siargao is just so good, I’m not gonna lie. It’s not that I’m insecure about me gaining weight, or it’s not that I think that I look bad because I’m gaining weight. I like my body now, it’s just that how would for example, like if a girl who’s younger than me who’s not really, you know, not really confident and who’s was still figuring out herself reads that comment? How do you think she would feel?

“Yeah, for example, like if it’s someone who looks up to me and was like, ‘I really look up to Nadine. She’s really my role model’ and she sees that. How would that affect her? That’s more of my point. Like I like shutting them down just because I don’t want other people to feel na ‘Ah na-ba-bash siya, like what if this happens to me?’ Like, you know, even if it’s directed to me I’m sure that it does something to other people who read those comments.”

Nadine also reiterated the value of the “this-is-my-life” mindset.

“Like, this is no one else like, this is not this Tita’s, this is not this person’s, this is not any of the fans’ life. This is my life and I’m in charge of this.”

She shared: “One of the reasons why I just pretty much just snapped out of it is because it took a while before I realized that ‘Why the f*ck am I listening to these people?’ Like, it took a while before I had that realization.”

“And I didn’t want to grow older thinking, ‘Oh, man, I wish I did this, I wish I did that.’ But then I couldn’t because there was this and I had to please people. And you know, there’s so many things that I want to do in my life that I really want to do and I don’t want to regret when I’m older. So I don’t know, I honestly don’t know where my courage is coming from and why I’m able to just say whatever I want to say or just do whatever I want to do. I just really don’t care anymore… I just want to live my life. That’s it.”