Why you’re still single

Published September 26, 2020, 3:03 PM

by Jules Vivas

We’re here to help assess why you don’t have a partner. Of course, only you can answer the question

So it’s National Singles Day on the third Saturday of September. The day is an unofficial holiday in the US, which recognizes half of its population who, whether by circumstance or choice, remain unattached.

The day commemorates the independent women and men. It is aimed to break down myths surrounding the single lifestyle. As a matter of fact, majority of singles don’t go through life depressed and directionless. Their social lives are full of purpose and active. Some just prefer solitude, while others seek interests outside their work-life while staying connected with family and friends.

Not everyone is part of a power couple. And if you’re among those wondering why you can’t find a significant other, maybe it’s time to assess yourself and your situation. We listed down possible reasons—if you’re fragile and can’t take hard to swallow facts, feel free to stop reading.

You are too career-oriented

Work, work, work. All you know is to advance your profession. You must remember that too much of anything is bad. Learn to strike a balance. You also have to consider what comes next after your retirement? And you can’t exactly cuddle your job in bed, right?

Choosy much?

Have you ever thought about what you’re looking for in a partner? Maybe you have set your standards too high. If you are disillusioned and discontent, then you miss the opportunity to have a good partner by looking for a prince or a princess that may never come. 

Can’t move on

Schitts Creek Ugh GIF by CBC - Find & Share on GIPHY

Learn to let go of the past. Clinging on to what is supposed to be finished will only weigh you down. As Walt Disney once said, “Keep moving forward.”

Attitude problem

Photo from lifehacks.io

While it’s true that you should never change for anyone, if your character is problematic, then improving yourself is necessary. Take note that you are changing for yourself. Maybe you’re too mataray (ill-tempered), mayabang (boastful), pikon (hot headed), or matigas ulo (stubborn). Look within and be a better person.


‘Di ka crush ng crush mo feels. Photo by Arwan Sutanto

Luck and timing also play a big part in love. You may be in love or have a crush on someone who is already committed. S/he may love you back but circumstance forbids. ‘Di kaya may balat ka sa pwet (You may have a birthmark on your butt cheeks)?

Note: The Filipino phrase means you are ill-fated.

Torpe ka (You’re shy)


Confidence goes a long way. Not just in romance, but in life generally. If you want something take it. Never lose from fear of rejection. Easier said than done. Courage, however, is an essential element to success. To quote Canadian hockey player Wayne Gretzky, “You miss 100 percent of the shots you don’t make.” 

You’re not trying enough or you’re trying too much

This is you, waiting for him to make the first move

Effort is another factor for success. If you like someone, pursue them. Then again, we go back to too much of anything is bad. Don’t be desperate. Also know when to fight your battles.

You are simply not allowed to go to a relationship

When you and your Mother talk about relationships

Either you’re too young, or your parents are too conservative. Tag na si Mommy at Daddy, baka payagan kapag nabasa ‘to (Make your Mom and Dad read this and they might finally let you go into a relationship).