IT’S THE SMALL THINGS
Alex Eduque
Thirty. A milestone I welcomed in the most muted of ways, but a year which I know will compare to none. While initial plans may have either been delayed, toned down, taken a bit of a setback, or transformed into an enhanced version of the original, what is evident is that God’s plan prevailed, and took precedence in the midst of it all. And at the end of the day, He truly knows what is in your heart. Flexibility has been, and will be key in the months to come as we continue to face a world where we plan not only erring on the side of caution, but also, with the contingency that it may change or be cancelled. Resilience is key – we may keep bending, but as long as we do not break, we will always have a fighting chance at getting back up and continuing on from where we left of. And then of course there is strength which we continue to pray for – strength in faith, in love and in compassion. Strength in our unity as a people that our world continues to be healed – not only from COVID-19, but from greed, anger, hate and pessimism; all of which have plagued every corner and continent at some point.
Turning 30 has awakened me to the reality that while we do grow wiser with age, with that wisdom also comes the humility to admit that in fact we know so much less than we think we did, or that we hope we do. That with that realization comes the hunger to learn more, and with the privilege of our freedom brought about by adulthood comes the overwhelming responsibilities reality throws upon us. Rather than being overwhelmed, I continue to remind myself that it is the time to be grateful for what I have, and for the company I choose to keep – the people who make my every day easier and better. Ironically, as adolescents, we longed to break free from the barriers and rules of home, and then slowly realized that as we got lost in our freedom, we also longed for the love, albeit sometimes tough love and discipline, of our family. As adults, we unknowingly cling on to the way we were raised, the manner in which our mothers ran our households, and more than ever, the values heavily instilled in us since we were children as we deal with decision-making and start living even more independent lives. We are grateful today more than ever for all that we have been taught as we venture out into the world to learn even more.
I am looking forward to this new decade in my life if only to welcome what I know will be some of my most beautiful beginnings. I am ready to unfold new chapters and continue to write the story I continue to live. While I will never be able to rewrite my past, I can definitely take lessons from it as I know will be valuable as I maneuver through more twists and turns in this beautifully imperfect life we are all blessed to live. As I enter my thirties in a time of fluidity, utmost uncertainty and change, I continue to embrace the courage it has given me, the strength I was forced to muster, and the love that has so generously overflowed and I was enveloped with. With me I carry the lessons I learned, remember the true colors, revelations, and characters of people I have met and let into my life, and learn to continue to accept the flaws of those I love most. I will control that which I can, but will relinquish too that which faith can handle. I will stop stressing over the small and insignificant, and aim to always choose to see the beauty amidst the darkness – in situations, in people, and in whatever trials life throws at me.
On a birthday when the blues could have quickly and acceptably overcome, it was actually one where I relished in the company and quiet of my nearest and dearest. I spent the day with no extra fanfare and fancy, but surrounded with the love of those who matter to me the most. To everyone who has been a part of my last 30 years, thank you for all that you have taught me and brought into my life – the good, the bad, and the ugly. It is because of you all that I am the person I am today. And on my last birthday before my life changes forever, I am most thankful for all that has been, all that is, and all that is yet to be.