Ellen Adarna’s most recent Instagram post explains why she underwent 14-day mental training in Bali, Indonesia.
In the nine-minute clip, the 31-year-old sexy actress said the program is called Kokoro.
“In Japanese, Kokoro means connecting the mind, body, and spirit or so, something like that, that those three should be in harmony,” she said.
Ellen revealed she was diagnosed with “depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder” so she thought the training would help.
“So what lead me into that state? I don’t really want to talk about it in detail because it’s something very personal. But let’s just say that so many things happened all at once. Like in a span of four months or less than four months, everything, everything happened, all the bad things that I imagined happened. So it was very traumatic for me.”
According to her, she’s the type of person who bounces back quickly or moves on fast after things don’t go her way.
“I was never really the depressive kind of person, you know. I mean, I always had this thing in my mind that ‘Everything is gonna be okay, if it’s not okay then it’s not the end.’ So you know, that ‘quote’ helps a lot, I mean, I live by that.”
Ellen claimed she went to therapists, physiatrists, and did counseling and a lot of talking.
She added that at one point in her life, she was on a lot of medication including tranquilizers. Anfld the panic attacks got so bad her body would convulse and she would puke.
“Like it was so weird. At that time, I didn’t know what it was because I never had anxiety like that serious. At first, I thought I was gonna die because everything was getting hard, my muscles were getting so stiff, and I felt like I couldn’t breathe,” she recalled.
“I was in a very dark place for two years, almost three years.”
After she quit relying on medicine, Ellen and her family went on month-long vacation.
“I thought I was getting better, but I wasn’t,” she said. “I mean, I was in a nice country and went to nice places and I still felt the same. It made it even worse because at that time I didn’t bring my pills.”
“And I was in a nice country with my family and I was just still sad, and you know, I really felt empty. I was still depressed,” she added.
Ellen said her next video is about her experiences in Bali.