(Photo by SVET DILIG)

Get on board the "Friend Ship" and allow me to share with you some inspiring stories about the bamboo that will help cultivate friendships. 

Telling them true stories through fun child-appropriate science experiments are effective ways to share the rules of friendship. The objective of the game (yes, it is more attractive if it is presented in a game-like manner rather than a lecture) is to "Concretize the Abstract."

The Bamboo is the largest member of the grass family. It is a woody perennial evergreen plant. It is the fastest-growing plant in the world with a growth rate of 24 inches a day. Then, imagine the bamboo as your child with the potential to grow and cultivate wholesome lifetime friendships.

What is the secret to the growth? Bamboos require full sunlight or direct light to fully grow and develop. A child needs spiritual and mental guidance.Direct mentoring and hands-on experiences have to be provided by the adult guide.

Regular watering is also vital for the young and newly-planted bamboo. Rainy season produces the fastest growth rate of bamboos. This is the second role that adults need to nurture the child.

Water symbolizes a refreshing nourishment. If your teaching method is not refreshing, then you may be withering the spirit and not cultivating it. Be playful yet firm when you speak to your child.

The God-factor of the bamboo is its unique rhizome-dependent system. A rhizome is a thick underground horizontal stem that produces roots and has shoots that develop into new plants. The job of the stem is to make sure each part of the plant has water. The job of the root is to make sure to get water for the whole plant.

Believe it or not, showing root samples will fascinate the curious child. Opening up stems to see what is inside is appealing to them. They will forever remember the job of the stem and root. Relate what their job is. Their job is to take the water so they will grow just like the bamboo.

The God-factor of the child is that they were created to have absorbent minds. They learn easily and bounce back fast. The crucial factor is the manner in which the teaching is presented that determines the easy digestibility or shall I say, absorption of facts.

Bamboos flourish in any soil type, just like the child. The important thing is the soil as it represents the child’s environment, particularly the family. The climate conditions signify the personalities of these adults.

Running bamboos are special kinds that tend to spread slowly and need careful attention during cultivation because of rowdy root behavior (to put it simply).

 An irate mom once held my arm in a seminar I was conducting and asked me if I could teach her child to control her anger. Her child had no friends,  was banging doors, abusing their dogs, very disobedient to the parents and her normal conversational level was a speak-scream.

I found out that the child was constantly being “timed out”, spanked and subjected to verbal abuse. I requested if we could do a gardening trio. The gardening therapy had a calming effect on them. Unfortunately, the plants died because of the negativity. Eventually, their mini indoor plants started to grow after the therapy. The dogs were happier too!

Then there is another story about an overachieving 9-year-old Chinese boy. He is obedient but impatient and quick-tempered. He is like water in a kettle, always steaming and about to burst. When he turns into "The Hulk," his younger brothers get all black and blue. His peers are afraid of him. His well-meaning soft-spoken mom is dumbfounded. How can he not be stressed? He wakes up at 4 am everyday and gets dressed and eats breakfast in the van. He has long extension classes to master Chinese and do all his assignments. It is too much for a child to take. He represents the typical student in most big schools today. Student life has become so stressful. This boy needed to vent.

So it's to gardening we turn to again! The environmentalists may be upset with me because as expected, the first plants usually die! But this child has a green thumb. He loved gardening.

Later on, I found out that he would tell his mom that he wanted to go shopping for seeds to plant. Two years later, I chanced upon his family in the mall. He comes up to me excitedly and asks,”Am I good?” (“How am I supposed to know that?,” I thought quietly)

“How are your plants?” I asked. “They are growing!” he replied.  “Having fun with your brother?” I asked his brothers. “Yes!” was the resounding reply. (No war-torn body marks.) I hugged the boy who has grown bigger than me and I whispered, “You’re Good!” He smiles and they resume shopping. I call them the bamboo brothers.

The bamboo has the potential to be lightweight (no excess emotional baggage please) and exceptionally durable hard wood when properly treated. It can also attain great heights. Imagine your child cultivating positive friendships. This is a step to success. Life is all about relationships.

The bamboo recycles soil nutrients by shedding a lot of leaves which becomes compost fertilizer for itself. (Get ready for a leafy shower! Kids enjoy throwing leaves. They don’t hurt so you can go wild.)

The lesson: the more you give, the more you’re blessed. Position your child to be a blessing. A giver, not a taker. You’re a winner if you give more. (Think Play! as I say these things.) Kids need to actualize positive actions to inculcate it in their system so that it will take root in their personalities.

The bamboo root system controls erosion. If your child is deeply rooted with core values that you have been “watering” and “shining” on him, then s/he will not easily break and retaliate. S/he will be steadfast and firm. Stabilize the self-esteem.

Lastly, from childhood past. I know that the bamboo is an excellent wind breaker. Teach your child the art of flexibility. Bend so you don’t break. It is better to keep peace than argue and prove yourself. You win more when you bend rather than face a head-on collision with the storm.

The bamboo is environmental-friendly. Make your darling, child-friendly. Cultivate bamboo friendship.